On Scheduling

For 32 years now, my days have been scheduled,

not by choice but because that's how long I've 

been in school and schools are run by bells.

Although I like to envision myself as a 

go-where-the-wind-takes-me type of gal, the

truth is, I'm not: I thrive on routine. Shocking, eh?

Yep, the majority of my travels and adventures 

have been, for the most part, thoroughly

 researched and well-planned before executed. 

Control issues?

Absolutely.

So when I found out I was pregnant, I made

a great effort to seek and sort out parenting 

methods and approaches.  I wanted to be well

informed in advance in hopes of finding one 

that would be a good fit for us and our lifestyle.

I looked closely at friends with kids to determine 

which sets had personalities closest to ours and

then I took an even closer look at their family dynamic 

to see if it matched the one we wanted for our own.

I think two important aspects of successful parenting

are knowing who you are and how you want to live.

After all, one person's heaven is another's hell.

I have friends whom I adore yet I don't want their lives

so I sought the advice of those I want to emulate.

Thank goodness I know who I am and what I need.

I need structure.

I need routine.

I need a schedule.

When I first got pregnant, a friend told me that the hardest 

thing about being a parent is ALWAYS being the parent.

She said, "Think of it like this: it's your job to do the hard

stuff, whether you like it or not.  It won't be easy to say 

no, to punish, to restrict, to deny but it's your job to do 

just that when necessary.  You won't do your kid any 

good by giving in to them just to make yourself feel

 better. Kids need you to be the parent; it won't be easy

 in the moment but it will make it much easier in the end".

Now, I gotta say that this particular friend is a kick-ass 

mom and her kids?  Well, they are pretty incredible:

well behaved, well mannered, smart, quirky, compassionate -

hell, everything you could ever want your kid to be, 

they are (yes, they are all extremely attractive, too, just

to stick the knife in and twist it around a bit) but best of 

all, they are happy and nice.  Really, really nice. 

So when she told me to read this book, I ordered

it immediately and then spent the next four months

calling her or texting her for clarification (or, um,

rather simplification since my brain didn't function

during pregnancy). Matt and I talked about the pros 

and cons of using its method and decided to try it.

Thus, The Cheeks has been scheduled pretty much 

since birth and it's been a godsend for us.  She first 

slept through the night at four weeks and has continued 

to sleep an average of 7 hours a night since.  She's 

eating more food than she probably needs and in her

first month of life, she grew 2 inches and gained 2 pounds

(which puts to rest the Babywise controversy, IMO).

In my next post, I'll elaborate on what we're doing

 (which we've modified from Ezzo's book and from my

two zillion conversations with friends) and let you

 know how it's worked for us, just in case anyone

 out there in Bloggyland is interested.

Scheduling works for us because it complements

our lifestyle; it may not work for everyone. Outside 

of the obvious, there is no wrong way to parent.  

There's your way and there's my way and 

the right way is the way that works for you.